The Ole' Anmeldebestätigung (One of Many German Words I Cannot Say)

I am seconds away from cracking open a beer to celebrate one small step forward. Folks, American bureaucracy is bad. I ain't gonna lie. Anyone remember this little breakdown of mine last year due to the fine customer service I received from Dell? Anyway, even though everyone warned me about the difficulties I'd face trying to arrange anything legally in Germany (I shudder to think about what happens if I do something illegally!), I had no idea I'd feel like I was back in high school Algebra, racking my brain, trying to understand what was going on around me.

Then again, at least in Algebra, there's a formula. You just need to figure it out to get your answer. But when it comes to bureaucratic bullshit, such a neat, tidy formula does not exist. It simply depends on which particular office you visit, who you talk to, the time of day, and apparently the location of the sun and the alignment of the stars.

I have a long road ahead of me if I want to stay here in Berlin so I've been more than happy to get cracking on the initial steps. Before visas or residency permits, I discovered that first and foremost, I needed to first get my heinie to the local Einwohnermeldeamt and register my residency so the police know where to go looking if this American decides to cause some mayhem. Okee dokee. I'm all set up now with a friend and can do this, kein problem, right? Well, I'm not even going to go into the specifics of the first visit which got me nowhere (and I even had a friend with me as interpreter!) but suffice it to say, I was not sure how to move forward. They wanted paperwork that I simply did not have, paperwork that caused many others to say, "What? I've never been asked for that!"

Sigh.

Then I started asking around and reading chat forums on the matter and quickly found out that due to the vast array of experiences at these offices, there were approximately 638 different pieces of advice on how I should proceed.

Last night, as I verbalized my gigantic "to do" list to my roomie, I suddenly got very angry. I wasn't moving forward with anything. And as awesome as my friends have been, I've been relying on them to serve as my own personal interpreter which is not only kinda crappy for them but also a bit tricky when folks tend to hold full-time jobs. So I suddenly made up my mind.

"Screw it," I said and slammed down my whiskey. (Okay, so maybe it was actually a sage tea with a bit of lemon). "Since everyone says it just depends on who I get, I'll go just go into the office by myself tomorrow and see if something different happens."

Long story short since the full story will be described at length in my tell-all book about life as an ex-pat in Germany (heh heh), I got my Anmeldebestätigung. In other words, some intimidating woman who did a lot of sighing and glaring while I shrunk down in my chair finally humored me and stamped a form for me that basically states, "Rachael lives here."

Finally, one teeny piece of success! After a whole lot of stomach aches, I managed to feel a temporary sense of relief. I practically ran home. I swear, I am prouder of obtaining this stupid form than my college diplomas. Finally, despite it being difficult and extremely uncomfortable, I accomplished something on my own here! I didn't understand 99% of what she said to me but I did manage to recognize a few key words which allowed me to thrust the appropriate form at her when she asked for it. But most importantly, I know to say, "Vielen Dank" and smile broadly when you are at the mercy of government workers. Someone once told me that my big blue eyes and smile would help me someday. At the time, this comment really ticked me off. But when it boils down to playing charades while trying to get one simple task accomplished, I guess I'll be working these eyes and smile the best I can.