The #1 Reason I Miss Having a Boyfriend (Perhaps the Only?)

FREE BACK RUBS.

I was reminded of this today after my little adventure called, Rachael Gets a Haircut in Germany. You can picture the accompanying Dick and Jane illustration, right? Rachael/Jane is looking quite shaggy. She then learns from perusing the dictionary with Dick that she must be on the lookout for the word, Friseur. But then she suddenly comes to her senses. She realizes that there is no way in hell she's going to walk into a German salon and mistakenly allow a non-English speaker to sheer her hair into some crazy crew cut due to her inability to say "short but not too short."

Enter the Toytown website where someone recommended the Holfeld Friseure and Spa. I cannot say enough about these folks. Tucked away in a lovely Prenzlauer Berg neighborhood, this Aveda salon/spa is staffed with English speakers. I had the amazing luck of walking in yesterday afternoon and finding that I could come back in a few hours for a haircut.

When I returned, in good Aveda fashion, I was given a cup of tea (highly appreciated after checking out the sights of the former east for three hours) and then, I was asked if I might like a little shoulder massage. I seriously don't think that the sweet young man had the words out of his mouth before I exclaimed, ever so brightly, "YES!"

And then, ahhhhh...hands digging into my shoulders. Then the neck. Oh, my god, the head, too? I wanted to fall asleep sitting up. Yes, please, more! I stopped myself from begging when he tapped my shoulders, that little sign for Yep, we're all done here.

As I looked at my reflection in the mirror, my flushed cheeks and tousled hair, I couldn't help but smile. "Mmmm...thank you," I murmured in a way that looking back, may have been a bit disconcerting to this poor guy who was just doing his job, for goodness sake.

Anyway, those five minutes reminded me how much I miss that aspect of relationships. It's just sort of an unspoken rule, right? You dole out the massages to your significant other knowing full well that you're gonna get them in return. (Otherwise, what's the flipping point?) And aside from a few doltish boyfriends who didn't know what they were doing, the trade was usually worth it. Strange how I don't really miss hand holding or cuddling but some strong hands on my shoulders and neck? Wowee...what a tease you were, Mr. Salon Man.

By the way, the owner of the salon ended up cutting my hair. He spoke perfect English and understood exactly what I wanted, even though I didn't really know myself. Awesome. I walked out with a cropped, sassy haircut, relaxed shoulders, and memories of old boyfriends, the good along with the bad.

But then I returned home to a warm kitchen with soup on the stove, a kind friend, and a goofy baby and those old boyfriend memories flew right out the window. I was quickly reminded how content I am with my life right now, solo in that non-partner way but surrounded by wonderful friends and family, even when I'm halfway around the world from most of them. Would I like to have some fun dating experiences? Sure. But for now, I prefer to pay someone to massage my shoulders rather than enter into anything new. Or maybe I'll just make the baby start walking on my back. That works, too.